A few days ago I was hanging out with a friend on a lazy Saturday afternoon. We were sitting beside San Francisco Bay reading under a few trees. Neither of us was really in a talking mood, and nothing we were doing couldn't have been done alone. But it felt good to be in the presence of others.
Eventually my friend got up to move to a spot in the sun. I was quite comfortable where I was, so I stayed put. A few minutes later, I lifted my head out of my book to see where my friend had moved to, except I couldn't find her. I swiveled my head in all directions and scanned all the sunny spots in sight, but to no avail. I was confused but it didn't really matter. I knew she was there somewhere, sitting in the sun, reading. I couldn't see her, but I knew we were still together. She was just a little further away.
But where does this stop? Where does the line between being alone together and just being alone start and end? Because even if I couldn't see her, I felt her presence. She could have went to the grocery store or gone back to her apartment to take a nap or went on a walk and was miles away. But regardless of how far away she was, in my mind I felt like she was still with me.
How do you cultivate that feeling? Can you convince yourself someone is with you even when you're alone? Can you learn to honestly believe that the people you love are always somewhere close to you, hiding just over the next hill or around the next corner? Or are you just lying to yourself?
She was behind a tree. I just couldn't see her.
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